Not For You - 9/20/19

“How much do you think I should sell this thing for?” Richard asked.

I took a break from sanding the full-bodied sculpture he had designed and pulled my particle mask down. I had taken a few months to help Richard, a former instructor of mine, with his automotive sculpture side business in exchange for some summer spending cash. The one I was working on was an automotive-inspired sculpture the length of a woman’s body because well, that’s what it was based on.

“I dunno. I’m thinking $200,000. You think that’s too much?”

“Well, I only need to sell one.”

For some reason, I didn’t hit me until then how sort of ridiculous my question was. It was as if I felt he needed to lower the price to attract a fine art collector who cared about the difference whether it was $200,000 or $170,000 or $150,000. I'd assume that if one was in a position of collecting fine art, they would be fairly well off and prepared to pay whatever it was worth to them for this one-off. For some people, it was worth $10,000. For another person, it could be worth $1 million. He already had one fan that would purchase ALL of his art, so there was that.

He only needed to sell one.

This was one of my first realizations about sales as an adult and Richard’s response to me still resonates with me to this day. Up to this point in my life, I was so focused on the mastery of creating art, that I forgot there was an entirely separate part of the equation.

Selling the art.

“So what if someone says the price is too expensive?” I hollered back.

“Then I say, ‘It’s not for you.’” Richard replied with a smile.

Boom.

If there was a microphone, that thing would be bouncing off the hardwood floor.

At the ripe age of 25, as I entered the world of dating (including online) and job interviews, I realized I was missing something.

Some call it game. Others call it swagger or charm. At the end of the day, it’s sales and in one fashion or another, while I felt aspects of myself were certainly marketable, how and who to market to was beyond me.

When I thought of sales, I pictured a used-car salesman, the door-to-door Tupperware/magazine/vacuum/Cutco knives salesman, or a sidewalk salesman, eager to negotiate and haggle. Or when considering dating, I thought I had to become some sort of pickup artist or acquire a ridiculous amount of wealth.

I was so wrong on all those fronts.

Being direct and honest about your product or yourself can be the best way to connect with an audience or person.

As I continue to gain mileage in business and relationships, the more I remind myself that I only need to sell to one." I don’t need to get everyone to like me or what I’m selling. The only thing I need to focus on is honing in WHAT it is that I am selling. When authenticity becomes the focus, the rest is easy. People accept or not. Buy it or not.

You don’t need to sell to everyone.

You are not a fit for everyone and everyone is not a fit for you.

Sometimes getting "rejected" has NOTHING to do with the lack of quality of your skills, character, or any otherwise quantifiable metric that you think you may or may not qualify. Sometimes it has nothing to do with you AT ALL.

I never found out if the sculpture sold, but Richard continues to make his sculptures as he has for decades.

Not expecting results from any interaction and letting things go is THE BIGGEST INSIGHT I've had as an adult. Connecting with a person or a job or anything in your life is never a guarantee. The world doesn't owe you anything. While I still strive for high-performance results, I've learned that things can come in and disappear in the blink of an eye. Family and friends. Health and wealth. Tides shift and it happens to us in silence.

Keep striving for perfection in yourself and the rest will fall into place when the time is right. It may not be when we want it to, but when it needs to.

Fuck yeah, it's Friday!